Y’all…I miss a man. I miss a man that lied to me. I miss a man that I let my guard down around. I miss a man that I hate I gave my attention after being single for several months. I miss a man who I had no intention of meeting anyone the night I went out and met him. I miss a man that even though I was questioning and side-eyeing just about everything he said but still continued to give him the benefit of the doubt.
I miss that man but…it’s ok. My body is catching up to realizing that he is no longer apart of my life. That all that time I spent driving back and forth to spend time with him is over with. It’s all apart of the dating scene and I’m learning to give myself grace. I can’t expect to meet my husband if I’m completely closed off to the world. These feelings would have had to come eventually right? As much as I would love to just step outside and meet my husband, life doesn’t work like that.
I’m learning to realize that I am, as cliche as it sounds, a lover girl. If I’m interested in you, I’m all in. 10 toes. Even as I’m sitting here typing this, that trait is literally in my DNA. I’ve tried many, many, many times to turn it off but clearly fail 🫠. I don’t think I want to turn that part of me off even if I could. Could I be more guarded or mindful about jumping in head first every time…sure. But…‘tis life. I’ll keep being the lover girl I am…just a more mindful, cautious lover girl 🥰
